Carmen Miranda (Ananas comosus), Part II

(This is Part II of the Ananas comosus profile, which covers how to grow one indoors. For historical, botanical, cultural, and scientific information about this plant, plus some statistically better-than-average jokes, see Part I.)I've attempted to grow Ananas indoors three times, and only one has worked out at all. The one that worked out was a cultivar called 'Mongo,'1 which we got in where I

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